Busy In NJ [Humor]

Wednesday, 2007-May-09 at 18:17 2 comments

I’m currently working more hours… in New Jersey.  I have not been here before, at least not as an adult.  I have a new name for the place: The Lost State, because coming here means you are going to get lost.  Daily.  For several hours.  Both on your way to work and on your way home.

Actually, I have spent less time lost each day, from seven hours the first day, to about half an hour today.  This is also the world's largest construction project, running from (at least) Newark to Trenton to Perth Amboy.  The local residents are very helpful to an obviously lost man asking how to get back to the highway.  In California, we do not talk to people who are lost, because they must be from Oregon.  In NJ, they will not only talk to you, they will tell you exactly how to get to the highway, and it is not their fault when you go the wrong way on the highway and end up even more lost than you were before. 

The weather is fine, except when it is not fine.  George Washington was in the neighborhood of Trenton, NJ, when the weather was not fine.  This happened because he turned onto highway 1 when he meant to stay on highway 9, and could not find somewhere to make a U-turn.

I recommend that all Californians come here to buy gasoline.  The price is only $2.85 per gallon or so for regular unleaded, which saves you sixty cents for each gallon you buy in New Jersey.  If you buy today, the state will throw in an escort by a special unit in the state troopers whose only job is to escort lost out-of-state drivers back to their hotels and motels.

Now I have to practice my Numa-numa dance moves.  It is time to go shopping, even though there do not seem to be any Fry's stores here.

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2 Comments

  • 1. Jason  |  Saturday, 2007-May-19 at 15:50

    Don’t I know it. I was supposed to meet my girlfriend at the time at a beach near Tom’s River, NJ. I drove around for 4 hours, a trip which should have taken an hour and a half from Philadelphia. Northern Jersey is even worse since it’s not even a little bit laid back, so you have to deal with crazy drivers as well as trying to read highway signs and a map while driving.

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